Seniors/Grandparents

» Carolbb - Aging, baby boomers, grandparenting

In response to Aging, baby boomers, grandparenting posted by maryan:

maryan,
I've written so much about those kinds of memories. I spent two decades caring for seven elders. Four of them had dementia, the most devastating of which was my dad's instant dementia after brain surgery. He lived for ten years in a kind of mental hell. The only way to deal with this after death is to heal by traveling back in time to when these loved ones were "themselves." When dementia lasts many years, it becomes hard to remember the good times; the times when we all had fun. But this is vital to the healing process. Though I'll never want to erase the years of caring for dementia afflicted parents, I do want to have memories of them before their dementia remain in the forefront of my mind. It's a struggle and takes time, but is worth the effort. Photos of them when they were whole can mean a lot. Stories told about when I was young - when they were at their peak - help me travel back to the days that I know they'd want me to remember.
I write about this often. I (and the others I interviewed) reflect on these issues in my caregiving support book "Minding Our Elders." My Web site and blog give much information and comfort. Feel free to check out www.mindingoureldersblogs.com. All the best with rebuilding your memories.
Carol Bradley Bursack
Minding Our Elders

-- posted by Carolbb